Don’t lose yourself in the relationship

Many of us lose ourselves when we begin dating. We tend to be overshadowed by the needs of the opposite sex. We get so caught up in feeling like if we give our all, then in return he/ she will do the same. Truth is this, you will never get the same energy from someone else unless you two are on the same frequency. What do I mean by that? I mean if you are not equally yoked then you you really are wasting your time and energy with that man/woman.

How do you lose yourself in a relationship?

1. Putting all his needs before yours and you are literally not getting anything out the relationship. It’s a GIVE, GIVE, GIVE, GIVE RELATIONSHIP! You have to get something out the deal!!

2. He cheats constantly over and over and over and over! You basically become mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually drained because you don’t know how to let go! He takes you through so much that you have no desire to even think you deserve better! Then one day you do one little thing, and he is out the door for good!!! You think how can this be, truth is men don’t put up with half the stuff we as women put up with. You play yourself by putting up with ALL OF THE NONSENSE! Everyone makes mistakes but you shouldn’t lose yourself when others are making mistakes

3. When you become a mother to his kids. You become the last person on the list of priorities. It’s the kids being a priority, then it’s his needs, then it’s you. By time it get to you, you are completely depleted! How do I know this, because I was a victim of it.

I can remember one Saturday, we decided to have a family day. Well it took me two hours to get my children together. My husband got himself together, while I had to get my two babies together and then myself. In counting that was my son, my daughter, then me. My son was 2 or 3 at the time and my daughter had to be 7 or 8. I remember getting their clothes together, ironing them, then bathing both, and then putting their clothes on, combing my daughter hair and finally sitting them on the couch until I got ready. Meanwhile my husband took his shower and put on his clothes that I ironed. Well it was my turn, I can remember I quickly found something I didn’t have to iron much and I threw my hair in a bun! I kinda threw my make up on, so it wasn’t a beat at ALL! I can remember my husband asked someone to take a pic of us as we was leaving the restaurant. In that pic, I looked so drained and wore out! I didn’t feel sexy, and I didn’t feel my best WHATSOEVER! I remember I showed the picture to my husband who thought the picture looked amazing. I pointed out how I looked like a rag doll and they all looked amazing. I cried and at that point, I promised I wouldn’t ever get that lost into my family ever again!!! I asked my husband for help because I needed it.

Our tradition when we go out now is, he get him and my son together, while I get my daughter and I together. He sometimes iron all the clothes if he see me bathing them. We are in this together! And when you are in the relationship together, there is no way YOU WILL NOT WIN IN IT!!!


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