Today I made a very controversial post on my Facebook timeline. As I scrolled down my TL, I saw a lot of women congratulating Kevin Gates on his new song. The new song dropped today, titled Dreka. Dreka is his wife and he basically was expressing himself through his music. I think expressing yourself through your art is very brilliant. I think for most artist, this is a therapeutic approach toward releasing one’s feelings.
I took time to go listen to the song because I’m familiar with the couple’s relationship. I don’t know much about them but I am familiar with their love story. I personally think Kevin Gates is a lyricist who words are powerful when he speaks. I think that is why I didn’t mind listening to his song. If I’m honest, I rarely listen to any artist other than JAY-Z. I do not listen to the radio, so I’m very clueless to all of the new artist that have surfaced.
I have to be totally honest, I was not expecting the song to go the way it did. I was thinking just from seeing all of the posts that were made, he was rapping about a beautiful love story to his wife. The reason I thought that, was because of all the praises I saw down my TL. Well I didn’t get that notation about the song. In my opinion and again it’s my opinion, I think it was mind boggling to hear him say she stayed SOLID! It was almost as if, he was indicating, because she was solid, he now have made a vow to MAKE HER HAPPY THE REST OF HER LIFE! As if, the only way she could get that type of treatment from him, she had to show she was SOLID.
That raised an eyebrow on my end. I literally had to listen to the song twice! So then, I went to social media. As much as I didn’t want to post about the song, something told me to do it anyway. After the response I received, I found peace in my post. It needed to be said.
I proposed the questions
Is staying solid what EVERY MAN WANTS FROM THE BLACK WOMAN? HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH BEING SOLID? When is not being solid ok? What’s the measures of SOLID? I’m asking for myself! I see so many women being solid only to end up more hurt each time thinking a man will change.
Oh the ladies were commenting, inboxing, and text messaging me with their responses. You will have to go to my page to see the responses and the posts I posted.
The one thing that stuck out to me was history and mental health. The two foundations of being solid when someone isn’t treating you the way you would love to be treated.
I think when only one individual is being SOLID in the relationship, that causes serious mental abuse. The psychological part of being solid creates an entire different outlook on being SOLID! As an individual continues to be solid with a person who has no respect for them, becomes delusional with REALITY! It’s just that simple. Nothing real makes sense to the individual anymore. Everything that person once knew has been stripped away from them. Your values change, your self- esteem changes, your perspectives change, your life changes, and most importantly, your heart changes.
Time is wasted! Life is consistently moving while you are being solid in hopes that HE/SHE comes around to your idea of how love should be. In all actuality you lose yourself when you are solid. Nothing is about you, yet everything is about that person! Here is why I say that, Gates stated, all the stuff he put her through makes him want to give her the world from this day forth. Basically saying now I will make it all about you. Let’s be honest, how many women get to that stage after being solid. Where a man finally admit they were wrong and they vow their lives to the woman. Not many!!!!!!!
Another form of solid is being with someone because of HISTORY!! So scared to be alone! So scared to start over!!! Many stay in disrespectful relationships because they rather put up with the individual at hand, verses putting up with any other person. So many women stay down to only stay down! Then they find themselves having to pick up all the puzzle pieces to start over because IT NEVER GOT BETTER! Time is something we can’t get back, so when you are hoping and wishing he will change, YOU CHANGE! Let it go and change the atmosphere in which new life could be established!
To every woman reading this blog, if being SOLID is the goal, reconsider the relationship!
All most men require is for his woman to be loyal of course and a safe place he can dwell inside!
When you have to show how solid you are to a man over and over and over again, that doesn’t indicate YOU ARE SOLID! It indicates you have truly LOST YOURSELF!!! 😘💕